Bodhi Arlo Mahaney: An Unassisted Birth Story

The first year goes by in the blink of an eye and it goes by faster with the second! I enjoyed this last year bonding with my son and learning about him with each passing moment. He has taught all of us a lot and we feel so honored to have him as apart of our family. We still tell his birth story as it was truly a romantic family event and I am going to tell it once more for his first birthday!

*All links included in this story take you to an article to describe something more in depth in the event it interests you, such as cord burning or placenta encapsulation*

This pregnancy was harder than my first. I had pubic symphysis diastasis with my first pregnancy and to put it politely, it was a bitch. They assured me though it wouldn't return, but it did with a mighty vengence at 24 weeks, I couldn't drink water until 26 weeks, I wasn't the prenatal yoga goddess you see all over instagram, and I had what they call prodromal labor which sucks butt! In other words....I wanted this baby out so bad I cried myself to sleep the last few weeks. I went into my first round of prodormal labor December 27th and it lasted 18 hours. The mind games of it all had a major impact on me.

Nino remained the positive one and assured me our baby was coming soon! They would have been two weeks early anyway. So to get my mind off the prodormal labor we decided to do a belly cast, bring out all the birth supplies for our unassisted birth. including our wood box and candles for the cord burning, gloves, pads, ingredients for the raw placenta smoothie Nino would be making for me (yes, he is amazing!), capsules for the placenta pills, essential oils (frankincense and lavender), red raspberry leaf tea, dong quai herbal tincture (I did have a slight risk for retained placenta, so I wanted this on hand, its not always necessary) and neutral baby items since we left the gender a surprise.

One saturday, Nino woke up with Amara and let me sleep in, prepared breakfast for when I did come out, and told me to take the morning for me. So I went into our spare room and had a simple yoga practice on the floor, meditated, did a reading for my birth using the mother wisdom deck, journaled, and took self-portraits. I released my expectations, my fears, and found my strength and peace.

The next morning I went to clinic and right in the middle of a massage I felt my first contraction that would start my 90 hours of labor. They would remain 10 minutes apart consistently for most of the week.

For the next few days, I would lay on my daughter's toddler bed while she played. She would come over periodically and rub my belly, my back, my head, and give me kisses and hugs. It was easily some of the sweetest moments of my labor as I enjoyed being with her before baby would arrive.

In the evenings I was still going to class since fortunately they were all lecture classses. They helped take my mind off the contractions, even pathology!

Wednesday evening, Nino begged me not to go to class. He told me I looked tired and beat from all the work my body had been doing already, but I wasnt convinced this was it. I didn't want to skip class for nothing. I assured him it would be fine, it was just professional development and I was just going to be sitting in a chair. "I promise if the contractions are around 3 minutes apart I will come home." They had been a steady 10 minutes since Sunday so I wasn't worried.

Shortly after I arrived, people started to ask me if I wanted to go home. I guess the deep breathing and pacing up and down the halls during breaks gave it away. Or maybe it was the squatting in the lunch room? Who knows!? I was in my own head and dead positive this baby was not coming any time soon. We ended up practicing chair massage which turned out to be a labor blessing! Two fellow student therapists helped me so much with the work they did for me that evening.

My friend was timing my contractions and she informed me they were much closer together than 10 minutes. They were 4-5 minutes apart and 90 seconds long.

On the drive home, a whole 30 minutes, I was dieing! I still told myself, "This isn't it, don't get your hopes up. Prodormal labor can do this and stop."

I had three contractions just walking from my car to the front door! When NIno opened the door and saw me, he said, "Tonights the night!"

I looked at him and finally said, "I do think this is it." I told him I needed to get some rest now because if this was it I did not have much longer.

I laid down in childs pose, the only position I could get even one second of sleep in anymore. After 20 minutes, the contractions were too much to bear. Nino had already passed out. It must have been midnight so I went to the restroom to try and labor peacefully without disturbing him. As the contractions quickly became more intense, I started groaning in low tones to channel my energy. I decided to try walking around and when I opened the door, our room was warm with candle lights flickering and gentle music playing softly. Nino came up to hold me as I started to feel another contraction. They felt softer as I laid my head on his chest and I felt a kiss on my forehead.

As the contraction passed I told him my plans to walk around a little bit. I didn't get very far before another wave started to overcome me and I came down into a squat, my arms around Ninos neck as he came down to my level for support. After a little while I needed rest and I tried getting back on the bed in child's pose, they were coming quickly now and I wasn't getting opportunties to recover from one before another one would follow. Nino massaged frankincense into my lower back to help me feel grounded and ease my pain.

Nino started a bath and asked if I would like to labor in the water. I agreed and he helped me in. At first, the contractions slowed down, which was nice. Then I felt a contraction start and I screamed, "They lied! They lied! THE PAIN IS WORSE!!"

I asked to go to the spare room where I had mediated on my birth earlier that week. I remained in the squat position, my arms around Nino as we swayed through contractions together. "Im so exhausted, I just want to sleep." I could hear myself repeat it. In the back of my mind I was scared. I had been in labor for almost 5 days and my energy was depleted. I thought back to my first birth where the delivery took a lot out of me that I did not feel like I had. I asked to try and lay down again, I made it through two contractions before changing to squat by the bedroom door. I felt an urge to push.

"Nino! I need my rebozo! Can you wrap it around the door knob for me?" I held on to the ends for support as I pushed. It was a false urge. Something told me not yet. Nino had the pads ready anyway. I walk into the bathroom to sit on the toilet. My legs needed a break, but I could not lay down again. The urge subsided and I decided to get up. I made it two steps, "Baby this is it," I said quickly as I dropped back into the squatting position to push instinctively. I felt myself release my jaw as I groaned, pushing with the contraction, one hand on the door knob and the other grasping around the towel rack. "The head!" Nino brought his hands gently around our baby.

"The body is coming." I warned him as I pushed again.

"ITS A BOY! ITS A BOY!" The joy was overwhelming. I saw a tear drop from Nino's eye as he handed me my son for the first time. I brought him up to my chest, my body quivering from our birth journey and the love rushing through me as I looked into his eyes seeing me for the first time. He was breathing and cooing, but not a cry passed his lips.

Born Thursday January 15th, 2015 5:20am.

I brought him to rest on the bed as we waited for the placenta. Nino draped a recieving blanket over him. A white one with grey elephants, lions, and lambs. After 45 minutes, I started to worry so I took a drop of dong quai and within seconds I delivered it. We waited to be sure the placenta was finished pulsing and then I held one candle as Nino held the other and we brought them together on the cord and did the cord burning ceremony.

Once the cord burned through, Nino took the placenta in a bowl to the kitchen to make my raw placenta smoothie. I had requested nut butter and it turned out divine! As I drank my smoothie, our newborn son nursed and Nino drew us an herbal sitz bath. I rested with him in the bath, washing the warm herbal water over his skin to rinse the blood away while leaving the vernix. Nino had to hold him for a brief moment to dry him off and he finally cried from losing contact with me. It was good to hear his strong lungs!

7:30 am came and we were really excited to introduce Amara to her little brother! She was so scared to touch him she blew him kisses and would only lay near him, but she stayed with us as we all basked in the love for our newest family member.

We took several days to get to know our son before naming him. We felt the light in his soul and on Tuesday January 20th 2015 we named him Bodhi Arlo Mahaney.

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